November 5, 2013
“Maybe it’s time to be clear about who I am. I am someone who is looking for love. Real love. Ridiculous, inconvenient, consuming can’t live without each other love. And I don’t think that love is here in this expensive suite, in this lovely hotel, in Paris.” – Carrie Bradshaw
I don’t know if is because I was watching Sex and The City yesterday, but I got to thinking about Love, a feeling that is a constant concern in our lives. It does not matter if you are a hopeless romantic or not, a time comes in your life when you will wonder who your love life would end with. And these questions are inevitable “Am I meant for marriage? Am I meant to have kids? Am I going to find someone to stand by my side no matter what?” and we continue to add more questions to our list. And the truth is that we do not posses those answers and we never will, until you see yourself going through that adventure that I called Love. That adventure where you pack your suitcase with what you think you need but it is never enough. The adventure you are never sure whether it will be your last or just a phase. The journey we take of finding Love in our relationships. Before we embark upon the journey of finding the relationship that is right for us, we may want to take the opportunity to refine our concept of whom we are and our ideas of what we want from life.
“The journey to finding a relationship is just that, a journey that uses all of our life wisdom and experiences.”
We have relationships through the years and we still haven’t found our Prince Charming or the person that will become our soul mate for the rest of our lives, or we have already found it, but things will never work out between the two of us, (and that’s life, that’s how things are supposed to be. Life is not easy and in the Love chapter things are more complicated than usual), but that does not prevent us for falling in Love again, for trying to heal our heart after a breakup, for putting ourselves available again, taking the chance to trust someone. That’s what love does to you and to me, it gives us Hope, to believe that there is someone out there ready to meet us and to take our breath away. In order for us to find someone we must follow this rule as Carrie Bradshaw said: “Don’t forget to fall in love with yourself first.” We won’t we able to love anyone, if we don’t love ourselves first. However, on the other side of the coin, there are people that stay in a relationship just because they are afraid to be alone, to lose balance, to lose socioeconomic status or even to lose the sex that comes with it. They are tons of reasons why people keep a relationship when they know is not going anywhere, but that’s not the reason I’m writing this. I’m writing this, because I think that we should be able to Love someone that deserves our love, because I believe that we can find our true mate, that it does not matter how hard the situation is, that is “Better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all”. Finding the relationship we want can come early or later in life. It may happen over and over again in one’s lifetime. There is no right or wrong for how to find a relationship nor is there a timeline that you have to follow. Follow your heart, listen to your inner voice, continue to become your own soul mate, and stay open to love. The journey of finding the right relationship begins with you. Find who you are meant to be and start loving yourself first. No one ever gets tired of loving, even though you love the wrong people, but you can get tired of how people act, how hard is to trust someone, to believe things will be different this time and that’s when we need to take our leap of faith and believe in Love. Ridiculous, inconvenient and consuming love.
“When it comes to relationships, maybe we’re all in glass houses, and shouldn’t throw stones. Because you can never really know. Some people are settling down, some are settling and some people refuse to settle for anything less than butterflies.” – Carrie Bradshaw